CRASH

Nusa Lembongan, Indonesia

Today I made the impulsive decision to rent a motorbike.

I figured that on a small island things couldn't go to wrong. Before I begin telling this story I should confess that I do not know how to ride a motorbike.My experience of riding such machines is limited to a small three wheeler Yamaha when I was 8 ( I crashed that too). But I put that to the back of my mind and decided to give it a go anyway. I managed to start the damn thing and take off down the rocky gangway. Within  a minute I glanced at the flashing petrol gauge and realised the bike had no petrol. 'that's fine' I thought "I will take the bike back'. Then I made a discovery. In the short time I had been riding I had managed to get lost. I decided I should ask someone for directions. But I was to make an even worse discovery. I had forgotten where I was staying.

I tried to stay calm. 'The Island is only 2 square kilometers, it can't be too hard to find". But it turned out it was. I bumped in to an Aussie tourist who was friendly enough to join me on my scavenger hunt. All we had to do was turn my bike around and retrace my steps (so to speak). Easy does it, no need to panic. As I was turning the bike around I pulled back to hard on the accelerator. SMASH, I managed to crash the automatic bike that a four year old can drive. I had performed this stunt for half the village to witness. The bike was relatively undamaged, but my pride was shattered. I dusted myself of, not sure whether to laugh or cry.

Then I saw the sign, "Nanuks Bungalows 100m". The damned sign had been there the whole time.

The Emotional Rollercoaster

Nusa Lembongan, Indonesia

Travel is unique because it is like nothing else in the world. You can find pleasure in unexpected places, and you never know what to expect. Something wonderful can suddenly become painful. Travel makes you reevaluate everything you believe in and question who you are as a person. Yet despite the challenges and heartbreak travel can bring, there is also so much beauty and joy. 

This leaves you wanting the board the emotional roller-coaster again and again, regardless of the whiplash.

Fields of Bali

Bali, Indonesia

The Art of Haggling

Seminyak, Indonesia

I am a terrible haggler. I think I have sucker written on my forehead. The western guilt I used to carry on my shoulders has lessened since I first started traveling. Unfortunately this has not improved my ability to barter in the slightest. I think a key factor that contributes to my hopeless haggling ability in Maths.  I suck at Maths even more than I suck at haggling. The other big factor is that I hate saying no. The word seems so toxic when it come out of my mouth.

Today I tried to buy some cheap flips flops to cover my naked feet. 450,000rp the young Balinese male said. I stared at him in a daze, 'hold on isn't that 40 Australian dollars' I asked myself. 'There is no way he would even try and get me to buy a pair of rip off thongs for forty dollars' I told myself. "Maybe it's 4 dollars and the argument in my head continued' My dazed look set me up. He began smiling broadly ('"this dumb broad is considering it'", is what I am convinced he said to his mate beside him).  Finally I reply with "that's to expensive". Then the supposed fun began. I got the price down to 100,000rp which was still 10 times more than they were worth (even in Australia). I handed over the money, because I  am way to nice. I smiled at him and said "I know you are ripping me off", he smiled smugly back. So I marched of in my rip of, Rip Curl thongs, cursing myself. 

I have had to walk back past him three times already today and he smiles and waves and tries to get my attention. I call back "these flip flops are hurting my feet, I think I was better of bare foot" He laughs, and so do I. I am hoping my bartering skills develop soon.

Flying Away

Sydney, Australia

My homeland always appears more beautiful the day I am leaving it behind. Even the suburbs appeared pretty this morning, basking in the dawn light. In a couple of hours I will be boarding a plane for Indonesia and my mind is racing.

It was only 56 days ago that I arrived back in Australia after my travels through Africa and Asia. I experienced and learnt so much during that time away. Coming home was a roller coaster of mixed emotions. It was a struggle to process how all I had experienced could fit into my normal life. I returned to work, and I realise now that I wasn't the same person. Living the same life was not going to fulfil me. My job suddenly became soul destroying

Last week I had a car accident. I lost control of my car on the freeway  and skidded up an embankment at 100km's p/h. The car somehow self navigated its way around a concrete wall and small trees. The paint from my car soils the concrete wall, evidence of how close I had come. My car rolled several times back down the embankment throwing me around like an out of control amusement ride. Miraculously the car landed back on it's wheels. I walked out without a scratch, the angels had protected me that day. 

But I was shaken with the realisation of how quickly it could have been all over. So as I set of for Indonesia today it is with the recent reminder of how short life can be. I will make the most of every moment 

One Month Later

Sydney, Australia

It seems like a life time ago that I was working in Africa and travelling the world. But I have only been back a month. It is amazing how quickly life returns to normal. I thought there would have been a profound change inside me, that everything would be different. But I look at my life and things seem exactly the same. I took the same route home from work this morning, ordered the same coffee at my favourite coffee shop and returned to the same house.

Maybe I am more grounded, more aware. Seeing and experiencing so much must change a person. Things have returned to normal so fast and slipping back into routine has been surprisingly easy. I realise that I rarely talk about my life overseas, about the tragic beauty of it all. About the inspiring people I met, about the remarkable things I learnt.

So where do I go from here. Do I allow my self slip into a monotonous existence. I want to make the most of every moment. That is what I loved the most about being abroad. I never wasted a second. 

Simple Beauty

Sydney, Australia

Sunsets that look like artwork, trees swaying in the Autumn wind. It would be easy for me to become depressed now that I am back home and confronted with reality. I have had my moments of melancholy, wishing I could fly away again. However this morning something shifted. As I watched champagne coloured leaves surrender to the breeze, I remembered that life is beautiful. Seasons change and I need to be grateful for the wonders that each day brings.  I look forward to travelling again; seeing and experiencing a world different to my own. But for now I will remember to enjoy life's simple beauties.

Coming Home

Sydney, Australia (3 days after return)

I have been home for three days now and my body is weary. I am not sure if I am still jet lagged or maybe I am a little depressed.

I go to the travel agent before I even unpack my bags. “Maybe I will go to India” I say to the lady. “Have you travelled before” she asks. “Actually I just got home yesterday” I reply.

Coming home is comforting. I take large gulps of shower water. I drive my car with the security of knowing where I am going. (Being careful to remember that there are in fact road rules here. I cannot honk my horn instead of indicating).

It is the first time in four months that my feet are not caked in dirt. I can drink tap water again and the cool crisp air is refreshing after sixteen weeks of humidity.  I get to sleep in my own bed and finally unpack my bags.

But it is quiet here and it feels like something is missing.

Coming home has been is in part a paradox. Realising that everything has changed, yet nothing has.

I am not sure if I am different. I know I don’t want my life to become average. I have seen and experienced too much to be content with monotony.

So what now?

In time I am sure I will be able to understand how I have changed and what I should do next. But for now I feel like I am in limbo waiting until I fly away again.

Spontaneity

Sa Pa, Vietnam (day 113)

"It's disrespectful not to accept a drink when you visit someone's home" one of the girls whsipered with a smile. So we downed our eleventh shot of rice wine. Soon we were dancing and partying in a small village in Sapa. The drinks kept coming and the night got crazier. I was having the time of my life at this unexpected village party.

I realised this morning that this spontaneity is what I have grown to love so much about travel. Every day is an adventure and a suprise. Sometimes travel can be stressful, draining and heartbreaking. But mostly my travels have been exciting, inspiring and enlightining. Surrounded by beauty and culture.

I decided before this trip began that I would keep my mind open and make the most of every opportunity. I have been rewarded with memories that will last a life time and new knowlege that can not be learnt in books. I have grown more resilient and more mature.

I look forward to travelling again and learning and growing even more.

Beautiful Vietnam

Sa pa, Vietnam (day 111)

I am not sure if I have ever seen such a beautiful sight. As morning breaks in Sapa a sense of peace sweeps through me. I open the window of the bus and let the crisp dawn air flow through my hair. I can smell the faint aroma of cooking smoke and last nights rain. The mountains stretch far into the horizon and are wrapped with mist. Crops cover the mountains and steep valleys like an optical illusion. 

As I draw closer to the end of this journey I get lost in my thoughts.  I have have had the most amazing four months of my life. My journey had been tragic and beautiful, heartbreaking and inspiring.